Strange But True

Latest news from the world of the subnormal

This photograph is conclusive proof that black holes exist.

The photo was taken during the last week of October at a location that for safety reasons has now been restricted to scientists. The black hole was first discovered when a taxi driver drove close by and was pulled round in a circle by the high gravitational pull of the hole.

"I knew at once what was happening and slammed my foot down hard on the accelerator. It was a close call, my car was a mini and now it's a stretch-limo", said the startled driver. "Of course, when you get that close to a black hole time starts to slow down. My first reaction was to check the meter and make sure that the punter wasn't getting a time dilated cheap ride", he added.

It is not clear as to how many things disappeared into the void before it was brought to the attention of the police but the following have been reported missing in that part of the city during the previous week - three cats, a dustbin lorry, three school children, a wallet, two postmen, four double-decker buses and an eighteen storey block of offices.

Don't say you haven't been warned and don't forget you read it here first.